My spiritual practice January 21, 2018

When I was a little kid, my grandmother used to take me to this little church in the village and

I always hated it.  

My grandmother was the most loving person I know. She always put everyone before herself, making sure we were well looked after on both a physical and emotional level. If I had a headache she would sit for hours and rub my head and sing to me. On cold winter nights she would teach me to cross stitch and bake delicious apples in the open fire, their aromas filling up the room and making my mouth water in anticipation.

When it came to religion, she tried to teach us kids to follow the right path. The path as she new it was full of guilt and terror. God was there to watch every move you make, every thought you think and punish you for your wrong doings. I guess she would also use God as a tool to keep us in check. To make sure we stayed honest she would threaten to take us to church and the priest would cut out our tongues if we were caught lying.

In my little child’s mind I didn’t agree with all the punishments that God would give us in case we missbehaved. Sitting in church for hours was terribly boring and if I shuffled too much I was upsetting God.  So I guess unconsciously I developed a great coping mechanism. Every time the priest spread myrth around I would faint and I had to be taken out of the church. This was great because I would spend the next few hours playing in the sun or just going around the graveyard reading the inscriptions on the tombs. Sometimes there were other children who stayed outside the church ( not sure how they managed to escape) and we would play together.

So I grew up hating the church and having mixed feelings about a God that I knew I should love otherwise I would go to hell.

When I later moved to London I became friends with Janice who is a Hindu. The first time I went to the temple and she told me I can just speak directly to God through meditation. That was the beginning of a new chapter,  it was a revelation. From there on I embraced hinduism, started talking with angels and learned different forms of meditation. All I wanted was to discover a simple way to reach God, to communicate with Her. From Reiki classes to Vortex Meditation, Theta Healing, Angel Therapy, Wicka,  I was looking for a way to discover and communicate with a loving God.

Nowadays I keep it simple. I enjoy a good morning meditation  before I start painting.

I communicate with the universal power as best I can and I check in when I make decisions, when i need something done or ask for guidance.

My series Quest was born from all of this. I feel that I have only started to scratch the surface. I have so much more to say with my paintings and I just let myself be open to receive guidance as in to what will I paint next. There is a beautiful flow between my spiritual practice and my painting practice. Sometimes I ask a question and I get the answer by way of a painting. Sometimes I paint unconsciously, I just let it flow. Other times I am i frustrate myself over a painting and can only find peace through my meditation. I love how the two intertwine.

 

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